January 2023 Knowing the Waters: Santa Answers

By Frank Chmelik and Tim Schermetzler of CSD Attorneys at Law P.S. - WPPA Counsel

 

It is a little-known fact that the Washington Public Port’s Association has a long standing interlocal agreement with the Greater North Pole Port Authority (“GNPPA”).  Through this cooperative agreement we have arranged to intercept inquiries sent by various WPPA executive directors and Santa’s replies.  We have printed them here.

                Santa:  One environmental consultant that does a lot of work for my port district really likes me.  I know this because he sent me a large fruit and wine basket with wine bottles that have real corks.  I think it is worth at least $250.  Do I owe him a return gift?

Dear Executive Director, I am sure the environmental consultant really enjoys your wit and personality.  But I am sorry, you can’t keep the basket.  You can keep “nominal” gifts, which are usually held to be less than $25 although your port district should have a policy on this.  As to the basket you can return it, you could donate it to a local charity for an auction, provide it as a door prize at an employee meeting or remove the wine and put the food into the employee lunchroom.  The wine then needs to be returned, donated, or given out as a door prize at an employee meeting.

                Santa:  The employees at my port really love and revere me.  They always smile when I talk with them.  They laugh at all my jokes.  I even hear them whisper stories about me then laugh.  I would like to have the port pay for a party for all these employees and their spouses/significant others.  Can you send some gifts?

Dear Executive Director, most executive directors in Washington state are loved and revered.  However, you cannot spend public funds on a Christmas party.  You can have a yearly “employee recognition/all employee meeting” and pay the reasonable costs of the employee’s meals, but no alcohol.  Usually, an employee committee raises money for the spouses/significant others to attend.  As to the gifts I will see where the elves are in terms of a backlog.  I think we have some cool “GNNPA” mugs lying around.

Santa:  I have talked with our aviation director (he loves and reveres me) and I just wanted to let you know that our airport will be open Christmas Eve for your use.

Dear Executive Director, thanks for the heads-up.  We have just completed avionic upgrades on the sleigh.  We now have a Global Navigation Satellite System (“GABS”) incorporated into the sleigh’s multi-mode receiver so we can use either a GABS or ILS approach.  We do not produce much turbulence and therefore can have close separation behind us.  We have always used green energy biofuel; however, we do dump spent reindeer fuel on the runway so you will need your crews to standby to remove the spent fuel (it’s great fertilizer).  I always remind everyone at the ports not to leave cookies and milk for me or carrots for Rudolph and crew.  First, I eat way too much of that stuff on Christmas Eve.  Second, you need to watch gifting of public funds.

Santa:  I am the executive director of the Washington Public Port’s Association.  I have a great staff (who love and revere me) and an executive committee that hangs on my every word and backs every one of my initiatives.  All I really want for Christmas is for the Legislature to pass the rail modernization tax credit.

Dear WPPA Executive Director, you are right – you do have a great staff at the WPPA.  But that request for the rail modernization tax credit is one tall order and I am thinking you really are a demanding guy.  Heck, this is your first Christmas as the new WPPA executive director, and you are already pressing on our interlocal.  Really? I will send you a “GNNPA” mug for the hot coco I hear you drink every afternoon.

                Seriously, from all of the staff and attorneys at our firm we wish all of you a very happy holiday season.

                As always, please contact your port counsel with any questions regarding this topic.  And, if you have a particular question for a Knowing the Waters please email us at fchmelik@csdlaw.com or tschermetzler@csdlaw.com.

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